Religion can do a number on men and relationships. Being a provider isn’t always about just money.

I love a good man. I think there’s maybe three left on the planet. Our political climate pushing traditional marriage by the religious right is really doing a number on some men, marriages and relationships. It’s the man is the provider and head of the household mantra that is levelling some men as well as women. It doesn’t have to be that way.

Most families require two incomes to pay their bills and raise their children. Two working parents or simply spouses of course have a different relationship than one person earning all of the income. Education levels and/or work experience/level are comparable in couples. Realistically the dynamic has changed because it has to change in order to be functional. Men are taught in church they are supposed to be the provider. Well, there’s more to providing than just income. Sometimes the wife is going to make more money. Sometimes it’s going to make more sense for the man to take off work to pick up the kids from school etc. Financially, it’s how it needs to happen in order to provide for your family. If it works, will that cause you to go to hell? I sincerely doubt it.

I know a few good men who shy away from women they deserve because they don’t feel they are in a financial situation to provide for her and possibly her kids. They don’t feel like they can offer what they are supposed to offer. That’s ridiculous. Emotional support, stability, someone to be able to count on in times of need, friendship, a partner to rely on, help raising children, or even providing a portion of financial needs is sometimes the difference between being solvent and not. Protecting your family or spouse is important. Money does not make a relationship work. So you think you don’t have the income for her? That’s not a reason. Maybe she doesn’t care and that’s not why she’s interested. Are you working? Are you sure your two incomes won’t put everyone where they need to be? Isn’t that providing? Marriages and relationships are supposed to be partnerships not parent/child relationships. You’re supposed to care for each other as you would yourself. That’s not really about money.