Saving a child after the loss of a parent. The difference between compassion and enabling destructive behavior.

I’ve had the flu or some such nonsense for several days now. I am cranky and I am more than a little fed up with a local kid and this kid’s situation. This is more of a post for my local readers, but it is applicable to everyone.

Small communities are usually great at supporting each other when a child loses a parent to something like a car accident or illness. They aren’t always great at distinguishing the difference between compassion for the child and allowing him to act out while grief is being processed, and knowing when to say enough, you are still accountable for your own behavior. Too often we go from compassionate to allowing destructive behavior that will literally ruin or end the kid’s life. It’s even worse when the kid is a member of a family with a little money and a little local influence. The kid is living in a protected bubble that does not extend outside of his local community. The kid and often the family fail to realize this bubble is finite.

This particular teenage boy is no different than many other teenagers across the country who experience horrible tragedy at a young age. His dad was killed in a car accident several years ago. I don’t know most of this kid’s family, but the ones I do know are very nice people. I have sympathy for this kid and his family. It’s a bad situation and one I’m thankful I’ve never had to deal with personally. This kid right now though is almost out of control to the point of no return. He is going to end up dead, in jail, or accidentally killing someone. It’s time to say when before it’s too late. He is driving around tailgating people, speeding, and trying to get people to pull over and fight with him. He is driving in two states that are constitutional carry. I know who this kid is. I won’t do anything but lead him directly to the police department. The driver out on the highway who doesn’t know him and doesn’t care, might decide to pull over and just shoot him. For this kid’s own benefit, some intervention needs to happen soon. He needs to feel some accountability that isn’t life ending. No one is doing this kid any favors by allowing this behavior to continue. I personally have my limits when it comes to being tolerant and compassionate for someone when I have my son in my vehicle going down the highway. My first priority is my son. You need to understand that. You don’t get to put my life or my son’s life at risk or under threat because your dad died several years ago. It simply does not work that way.

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